Allow Yourself To Just..

It's okay to feel. 

It's okay to feel something even if the feelings bad. That's what I'm learning. Sometimes, things happen and you just don't want to deal with the aftermath. Your thoughts  become too overwhelming and your emotions too deep. 

See, I did anything not to feel. Not to relive something. Effectively drown my sorrows in anything but my sorrows. 

Yet, in the face of it, that is the most counterproductive you can get. 

Escape everything sure. That can be done. Leave the country - break off from everything I know. Easy. 

However, I simply cannot break away from my mind, soul and sprit. They are an inherent part of me. 

As a result, I cannot unlearn what I know or unfeel what I do. 

I can simply - and only this.. Simply allow myself the pure grace of feeling..

..Something. Crash or burn or elated joy. Either way it is respecting yourself enough to allow for feeling. It is saying, I am weak and human and that is a beautiful thing. Don't berate yourself for what you can't control.  

After all, going numb to every emotion does not stop the emotions from flowing when I come back to consciousness. 

I am a sentient being, I am someone who feels deeply. Sometimes I feel things that are not good. 

That is okay. As long as you don't shut yourself off of yourself, even if that means feeling something bad.. You'll get through it. 

Accept the feeling. Allow it to wash over you. Chalk it up to experience. And then move on. 

It may not be what I want to hear right now, but that's really all I can do. 

And it's enough. 

After all, even the tallest, prettiest flowers have to grow through soil right?

BE. 

DECODED

['... The story of a million MCs all over the world who are looking out their windows or standing on street corners or riding in their cars through their cities or suburbs or small towns and inside of them the words are coming, too, the words they need to make sense of the world they see around them. The words are witty and blunt, abstract and linear, sober and fucked up. And when we decode that torrent of words- by which I mean really listen to them with our minds and hearts open- we can understand their world better. And ours, too. It's the same world']

Shawn Jay Z Carter - Decoded

Words give me such strength. Choose to tell it, and it appears- instantaneously. 

Words allow us to visualise things before they are. Words allow us to tell stories of a desert a thousand miles away whilst in the safety of our homes. Words are power that humans hold of the highest degree.. They give us a verbal way of communication that relates to people across the world. Think of the  prominent books across all time that have touched hearts and cultures: The Diary of Anne Frank, To Kill A Mockingbird, Romeo and Juliet and Pride and Prejudice to name a few classics. 

These novels have been read and reread many times because their message still resonates with us long after the author himself has withered and died. 

The characters they've created however still have a tangible influence on today's culture. Understand that only words, used correctly, can have such instant impact. 

That's why I am so in love with rap and rap culture. I love words and I love melody, so crafting both together to create an unique sound with an underlying strong bass is just a piece of heaven for me. I can't quite explain it,  Rap moves my soul. I say this because in my opinion there is no purer art form then words. So, to conjure up words with such essence, such feeling does something to me. It's unexplainable. 

You'll either love rap or hate it, but please don't dismiss it. It is a true art form. To craft words in such a way that it sits between a bed of beats is a true talent. The conception of the entire track is solely at the discretion of the artist. It could not be any more personal or raw. Whatever the emotion: happiness, anger, disgust it is expressed through the words the artist uses. 

Rap can be witty and funny or serious and shocking. It can take your breath away with the clever stories it tells. It can have single, double or triple metaphors all at work in one line. The multiple meanings in one song make it a dynamic discipline : the stories that are told come alive, ignited in the listeners mind at that very second.  

You do not need props or paint in order to tell a story, tell it and it just is. 

Such power should never be under estimated. So this entry is much my  overdue tribute to the power of words. After all these years, whether I have wanted or not, the words have come and still keep coming. 

After all these years, it's still the only way I am able to tell my story.  

BE. 

I Am Beautifully, Wonderfully Flawed

"I am the architect of my own destruction" - 

How I want the words to spill of the proverbial page tonight. So much on my heart, it's hard to conjure up the right words to express them. 

I'm surrounded by many things in my life, friendships, burdens and love. Yet I am constantly discontent. I want to feel at peace and one with myself and my place in the world. Instead I'm plagued with anxiety; I'm not advancing at the pace I want to go at, not leading the life I think I'm supposed to. And it's difficult man, fucking difficult to constantly not meet your own expectations of yourself. To constantly be your own source of disappointment. 

'Nobody to blame Kurt Cubain I did it to myself'

http://youtu.be/6AIdXisPqHc

It's on you man, it's always on you. The weight of that every day, every second. is quite frankly crushing.  What a heavy burden to carry. To never be good enough for you. To berate yourself day by day: 'I could've worked harder', 'I could've looked better' 'I could've sounded more intelligent'

I do it way to often. 

Anyway, the other day it came to the point where I couldn't stand my own thoughts any longer and broke down. 

A close friend reminded me that I would never treat my enemy let alone my closest friends the way I treat myself sometimes and I (albeit reluctantly) agreed with her. How very true that is. Once you all put it into perspective.. 

You have one body, one mind and one soul. Don't soil your spirit unnecessarily. Let go of things that distress you. 

Stop. Pause. Reevaluate. 

Don't choose to launch into a multitude of attacks that only work to further dampen your soul and undermine your spirits...

Learn to Forgive and Love yourself. You are beautifully, wonderfully flawed. It's in your genetic makeup to be that way. Who the fuck am I to fight against my own biology?

Just know that It really is all okay, Tomorrow is a new day and you can try and fuck up a little less. 

Again, FORGIVE yourself. You are not perfect, nor were you ever designed to be. Don't put yourself up to unrealistic goals or wishes. This in particular is 

the most difficult lessons to learn but it all the more necessary. 

Revel in both your imperfect actions and your imperfections. They make you, your quirky unique self. 

BE

Incomplete Thoughts

Recently, I've been finding it very difficult to find the words, at all. Writing, has always been a form of escape. Being able to paint a picture with my words is something that I always have revelled in and enjoyed. As of late however I am less and less inclined to let the words speak for themselves as it were.

Being the obsessively self aware person I am, I recognise why- it is because I am missing a fluidity in thought which translates into my writing. I need to clear my mind in order to renew and write with a fresh lease on.. life. 

Life itself recently feels stale and repetitive. I'm not someone who enjoys a mundane, banal existence and I feel unable to write because I am so uninspired. 

So what do I do? I look to the future. Where the skies are blue and life is good. I look forward, hoping that I will feel something again and soon, because somewhere in these last few months I've been a little numb to the motions. 

Everyday living bores me. I live for special moments that cannot be repeated. I live for those conversations with someone you barely know that shocks you speechless. Genuine connections that broaden your perspective. I live for those comments from friends that just tell me they are grateful I'm around. Those stolen kisses on street corners from the handsome guy I met in a bar. That surge of pure happiness when I'm walking down the street and the air feels crisp and fresh- and my soul feels vibrant and light. I live for those moments where I'm listening to Take Care and every track  and melody that I've heard a million times feels like the very first time. Moments where I feel my heart pump as the familiar sounds ooze through my veins.. and Drizzy is singing to me.

Moments. That make you feel alive and happy and blessed. Small ones, blink and you'll miss them. 

Well recently, there have been too few of them and too many of the everyday. How I hate the everyday. I don't find any source of wisdom or inspiration in my commutes around the city with stone faced people and bored students. I don't see any life in the people I'm on a day to day contact with, there's no experience behind their eyes or hurt or love. Through association therefore I become like them, just going through the motions once more- doing it all over again the next day. 

Well, it bores my very soul. 

So I haven't written. Not like this for a while. Just because I always aim to leave all my thoughts on the page when I do, and as of late.. Well they've been nothing special. 

Feeling as uninspired as I have been lately makes me less able to deal with life. I can't rely on my creative mind or inherent belief in a greater purpose if I'm just not feeling like there's much of either. 

Of course, my unconscious recognises life is bigger then this, that the expression I'm searching for is very much still within my reach, but I haven't wanted to reach out. 

I guess you could say that life, with too much of the ordinary and not enough of the extraordinary is exhausting me. 

To this I have two possible solutions. I either need to get away for a short while. Renew and refresh. Or go away for a long while. Travel. Just me and my thoughts. I need to fall in love with life again, only then will the words flow easily. More then that, I need to absorb life again. I need to find pleasure in every moment, every conversation, every track on Take Care once more. (Okay that's not true - I still enjoy Take Care beyond words. The day I don't is the day I'm in serious trouble.) 

I want to go to galleries and stare at art forms. I want to have intelligent articulate conversations with someone. I want to connect with something once more. And none of this, will happen while stay here, in the safety of all I know. I'm so in love with my city but I need to get out of here in order to grow spiritually. 

So, I've decided to take a gap year when this year is over. For sure. I need to feel mesmerised, in awe, vulnerable and challenged again. Life here is too repetitive and people much too predictable. Same old shit. 

Fuck that. 

I need to go see the world. 

After all, life begins at the end of your comfort zone right?

And apart from anything else it will for some fucking inspired pieces of writing. 

Words (ironically) cannot describe how much I can't wait. 

BE. 

Legacy

When my story's told, how will they tell it?

Will they say I was a giver or will they say I was selfish

Will they say I was a sinner or pretend I was a saint

Will I go down as a winner, what's the picture they gon paint

Wouldn't say that I'm a quitter that's one thing I know I ain't ain't

Will they tarnish, will they taint?

Glorify me, overthink, say they know me, say I'm great

Say I'm phoney, I was fake

Say the things about me they never told me to my face

I was loved I was hated

Just a nigga with a dream

I'm a liar I was honest, I was all of these things

When I'm gone let em talk

They discussing who I am

When they bury me just know I was nothing but a man

I was nothing but a man. 

I Was Here

I found myself listening to 'I Was Here' by Beyoncé today and as usual I got this fiery sensation within me. Somehow it happens everytime I listen to that song. Let me put it this way, the desire to be somebody overtakes me in the best way possible and I feel this ambition of steel in the pit of my stomach. You know that feeling? Of pure adrenaline and determination. Listening to it, I become refocused and motivated again. Indeed it reminded me why I'm doing what I do.

Sometimes moments like that are necessary as it reminds us exactly what we're fighting towards or more importantly why. Day to day when things aren't progressing it may feel as if we're constantly fighting against the world and ourselves in order to achieve.. what exactly?

The responsibilities you carry today maybe so burdensome, it becomes easy to get swamped and forget that you have set goals and ambitions. The beauty of it is you get to choose the direction you're life is going. The difficulty is you have to get there on your own merits. 

Understand that the challenges you may face today are the necessary stepping stones to greatness. In order to leave your mark in this world, in whichever field, you have to put the work in.

In order to become legendary and celebrated the world over you have to come from your version of the bottom and push through the day to day struggles so that you can reach those unattainable heights. You have to do all of this, if you want to create a legacy behind. You have to do all of this if you want to be unforgettable. 

'This world will see, I was here' 

http://youtu.be/i41qWJ6QjPI

BE. 

White

 

When I closed my eyes today all I saw was a blank canvas. It made me smile.

That there is new beginnings. It made me think. Everyone is born with a white canvas, no stains on it just yet, no heartbreak, memories, moments.  No life. Just pure, white, and beautiful in its own way. Raw. 

It reminded me that there is always a new start, for tomorrow is a new day. There's always second chances. It got me thinking back to the blank canvas.. How it hadn't seen the world yet. However if you look at that same canvas again in 20 years time it will be splashed with stains and scars of all kinds. It will be filled with deep reds and high yellows. The pencil marks on it will be so deep through the paper; scars that are eternally visible. 

The canvas is you. 

It's full of the people that have come and gone in your life. It's those who have left a permanent mark and those just bristled through. The canvas showcases all of the highs and lows, the mellow blues and startling oranges that sum up your life. 

Surely that's what it's about right?

Surely, at the end of the day those with the most vibrant, colourfully marked slates are the ones who have truly lived. Sure the canvas of your life can be full of hurt, wrenching despair and quiet loneliness. But the beauty of it, the magic is that that very same canvas is also full of beauty, laughter and all consuming love. Good and bad existing simultaneously side by side. You will never know the value of one without the presence of the other. Looking at that accumulation of moments you can say you have lived. Live such a life that at the end of it all you can take a step back and yours will be a raw art. Filled with life.

Would I want a pretty blank canvas? Never. 

I would take my marked, bruised,  hurt beautifully flawed vibrant canvas over that one any day. 

Because I know I will have lived a damn good life. 

BE 

We All Need..

Breathe. 

Come on, come on

You have got to move on

This is not the you i know

This isn't real

It's just all you can feel

And that's the way that feelings go

And whether or not it's right or wrong you'll do what you will do

When the cloud in the sky starts to pour

And your life is just a storm you're braving

Don't tell yourself you can't lean on someone else

Cause we all need saving sometimes

Say what you will but the time that we fill

While we're on the earth

Should not be alone

We were meant to be known

You make me what i'm worth

But i can't keep you from yourself you'll do what you will do

I don't know why it has to be this way and

I don't know the cure

But please believe someone has felt this before

Time

I wish I could find the words to explain my soul to someone. Yet there is too many words in my vocabulary to explain and yet- still, not nearly enough. I'm pondering the presence of time in my life and like my thoughts how fleetingly they pass by. 

19.. Birthday girl. How did I get to live through 19 years already? And at the same time, how am I only 19? I feel like I've lived a thousand lifetimes. Time. A mechanism that only one works way.. I read somewhere that the moments after its gone, the word after its been spoken and the stone after its been thrown are the only things that cannot be recovered, and how true that is. 

Instead each moment given to us must be cherished and lived thoroughly. Understand that I see life as a series of moments  rather then an ongoing process.

For me it's that crazy night on a random island in ibiza, its drunken nights at Portuguese bars, its the feeling of snow under my feet, its that conversation in the park. 

 Life is simply a collection of experiences intertwined with the ticking clock of time. Blink and I'll be 30 years of age. And then what? It truly is an accumulation of good and bad experiences. At the end of it all, much like an obituary they'll list all of your achievements and travels on a piece of paper. That's it. Your life achievements and successes will be your remaining legacy. Noone will ask 'but how much did she love?' 'How much did she live?'

Noone will know your incomplete desires, all the places you wanted to go but never did. Noone will know the fears etched in the deepest part of your soul. And no one will care. 

So in the words of Lytton 'Leave no stone unturned' and leave no ocean unexplored. Work your very hardest to fufill your potential with the gifts given to you. 

Im planning to live such a life that, on my very last breath I know I've left all emotions, hopes and dreams in the world and done all I ever hoped to do. 

What about you? What's gonna be your legacy?

BE. 

Solitude vs Loneliness

Solitude. It is something that I revel in. The noise of the world can become so loud sometimes that I'm unable to hear myself think. When I'm given the opportunity therefore to slow down and just be, I find it's both heartening and enriching for my soul. 

Being alone is crucial for everybody. We need the time given to us to recharge our deplated spirits, calm our racing thoughts and re-evaluate our actions. This type of soul searching activity can only ever be done alone. However, it is important to draw the line between healthy, voluntary solitude and loneliness. It's easy enough to fall into a trap of hoplessness and despair when you spend too much time by yourself. The silence can be deafening and your thoughts crushing. I find I walk this line of solitude and loneliness often as a writer-  on occasions where the words flow easily I am enthused by the endless hours of possibility ahead of me. When they don't, it is just me and blank page with nothing to say, and on those dark days I become consumed by my thoughts, spending too much time in my own head. 

It seems to me therefore that there is a delicate balance that needs to be struck. It is essential that we place great emphasis on constantly developing the inner workings of our minds, making sure that we're always heading in a positive and progressive direction. This can be achieved through constant reflection.  However, we musn't plague ourselves with senseless anxieties and incessantly negative thoughts. We are only human after all. Indeed it's perilously easy to go through the days events and nitpick at what you could've done better. I'm particularly guilty of this; Instead of focusing on what I have achieved during the day I can become enveloped in irrational frustrations, quickly turning into my own worst enemy and becoming unmercifully critical. 

For this reason spending too much time with yourself can have a negative impact on you. We are social animals and have been programmed to co exist as one, not as individuals. By being alone for a prolonged period of time, you may forget that outside those four walls lies a whole world waiting to be explored and experienced. Let me remind you. l

Don't be a prisoner in the confines of your own mind. Instead of highlighting all of your shortcomings or daydreaming about the ideal version of yourself, go out and work towards becoming that person. Go out and live.  Fall in and out of love, feel passion, fear, anger or whatever. 

But, dear friends don't ever allow yourselves to, in a world with 7 billion inhabitants to ever feel lonely. You are much too loved for that. 

"A man is but the product of his thoughts.  What he thinks, he becomes" - 

Mahatma Gandhi

Mutual Understanding

Perhaps all we crave is mutual understanding. A friend and I came to this agreement and I've been pondering on what it is to 'understand' someone completely and by extension how our day to day interactions with those arround us fundamentally effect who we are.

As human beings, you learn very early on how necessary it is to maintain healthy strong relationships with those around you. As a baby, you're dependent on you're mother to nurture you into being. Her relationship to you is, in a very real sense essential to your very survival. As you get older your romantic attachments can enhance your spiritual growth and result in life events, such as getting married. The relationships you forge with work colleagues can become  essential to your sucess at work. It can be said therefore that we all need each other. Not only in a biological sense, but also in psychological one. We cannot simply  flourish and progress alone. 

Relationships, are by far and wide the single most important investment you can make in your life. Understand that I write this entry more to highlight the unsung heroes in all of our lives. The individuals that pick us up when we simply cannot face another day. Appreciate them. The relationships that you chose to maintain today are youre most precious asset. Don't let them go. When you are burdened with the weight of the world on your shoulders, it is those very people that will pull you out of the gutter and back into the ring, ready to fight again. My friends give me that necessary life + motivation everyday for which I am eternally thankful. 

For that reason I'm very hesitant to cut people out of my life even when I've been wronged. You invest an awful lot of time and energy into people, to just give up on them when they mess up. Even though it may hurt when the people closest to you hurt you- remember this: everyone is flawed and trying to figure it out. They deserve a second chance just as you would if you messed up. Don't give up on them yet. 

That being said, don't let yourself be pushed over or used by anyone. The people we hold near and dear says a lot about us, personally. After all, birds of a feather flock together. It is crucial therefore to surround ourselves with people that bring out the best in us, that are constantly pushing us to progress and encouraging us in all things, to be great. To anyone doing the opposite- good riddance!

Back to my point about mutual understanding, in essence I think we are all searching for the same thing by a different name. We wish to find a kindred spirit within another - romantically or otherwise, a person that gets us on a deeper level. After all you want to look at the people close to you and see a true reflection of yourself. We crave a genuine connection with others that surpasses the superficial. We want to understand and be understood. I believe that that simple fact exemplifies what it is to be human. We need each other. 

"Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. 

I'll meet you there" - Rumi

BE. 

Purpose

What motivates you to get up in the morning? When you open your eyes in the morning why do you choose to face the day?

Reality hits hardest in the morning. Between the dreamlike state and harsh reality that you exist in the second you wake up, why do you decide to leave the comfort of your warm, alluring bed into the coldness of life? 

Reality washes over me every morning and every morning my reality is one that I am not content with. So I ask this question with the intent of answering it. 

I get up in the morning to make sure one day when I do wake up, my reality will be identical to my dreams. 

Purpose: the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists.

It is the single greatest gift given to humans. To be able to work toward a solitary purpose and push for a better day allows us to tangibly change our environment. It is that purpose towards that goal that gives us our drive, work ethic and determination.

Indeed, without something to live for we would live for nothing.

Understand that I'm far from immune to human weakness. 

 For every morning I've woken up and felt the reality wash over me I've been so seduced by the idea of closing the blinds and giving into the beckoning lure of sleep. How easy it would be to turn back around and not have to deal with this life. Not to have to deal with the problems or the people or the incessant noise of the world. How simple just to roll over into..blissful nothingness. 

And yet, we can't. We have to keep fighting towards a better future, a better tomorrow, a better morning because if we didn't where would any of us be?

If we allowed ourselves the luxury of not facing the day would women have the right to vote today? No. The right to vote was granted in 1928 as a result of the suffragettes relentless petitioning towards there movement. Similiarly, MLK would have never made the strides he did in the civil rights movement if he had simply decided to roll over and ignore the obstacles he faced. 

I ask because I wanted to explore where that motivation to get up and do comes from. Especially when you're plagued with countless problems, it is the most alluring thing to just switch off and just not deal for the day. So what make you not give in? 

 I recognise that it is within the confines of humans and their drive to be better and do better that people get up and go. Either for yourself or others around you, you get up because you have a reason to. Even if you hated your job you love your family and need to provide for them. Doing so keeps you active, involved and productive. 

Staying idle is the most deceptive of friends.. 
It is working towards a true purpose that keeps you alive. 

Purpose gives renewed lease of life everyday.  

Expression

As human beings we have this constant need to express who we are. Its almost as if we need to prove to the world what we're about, constantly letting others know what we love or hate to an equal degree through mediums such as music, art, dance, drama etc.. So I ask where does this urge for expressing ourselves come from? What motivates an artist to paint, or a dancer to dance? What emotion are we trying to get across to the rest of the world?  And does it all come from the same place?
I ponder these questions as I ask myself what prompted me to write this blog in the first place. I can only speak for myself but the desire to get across to the world what I felt was so monumental, and so I did it the only way I know how;by writing. Perhaps expression in all its forms comes from a place of needing to create something bigger than ourselves, that lasts. We need to be the creator of something that exists on this world long after we don't. Whether that's making a piece of artwork that stands the test of time, or a legendary song we all, in our own ways, wish to leave our mark on this world.
We need to believe that the world was a better place because we were in it. It's almost fundamental to our existence, because otherwise what is the point of living?

Indeed, the need to put a stamp on something, and say this is me, this is who I am is so strong even in terms of aesthetic appearance with our make up or clothes. We constantly need to make a statement to the outside world. This may derive out of a internal fear of being overridden or forgotten. Our chosen mediums of expression serve as a reminder to the world that we are "here." That we exist wholly as opinionated and loved individuals. That not only are we a part of this world, but we have something worthwhile to say and you're going to fucking sit up and listen.

So I ask, what is the source of all this expression? What single emotion pushes an individual to want to create, mold and shape? Our external creations can become such an integral part of us that they define our identities. A good musician is obsessed with their craft, putting endless hours fine tuning the melody, the sound and the lyrics, to the point where what they do becomes who they are.
To go back to my initial question, I believe any form of expression has to be born out of a place of internal suffering. But that is not a bad thing, in fact I believe that channeling that negative energy into creating something worthwhile and long lasting is the only way we can truly fulfill our potentials. In order to create something which is the truest reflection of yourself you need to almost be at breaking point, to really feel. You can only do this when you come face to face with all your hindrances, fears and insecurities so that you can reach within, at your most vulnerable state and make something great. Suffering creates the necessary emotional energy with which we can express ourselves in the most honest and raw manner. 

"A great artist... must be shaken by the naked truths that will not be comforted. This divine discontent, this disequilibrium, this state of inner tension is the source of artistic energy."- Goethe

Do not be afraid of your own limatations, for they are a stepping stone to a greater understanding about yourself. Express any pain you feel with the thousands of different mediums available to you. Above all chose to do great things with the limited time you have on this earth. Make yourself unforgettable.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i41qWJ6QjPI

BE.

Spiritual Connections

A good friend once told me that I will find the words, though in all honesty I am struggling right about now. Maybe I find this entry difficult to write purely because I feel the weight of its meaning to me. Nonetheless I'm going to try and let the words flow.
I guess my struggle derives from a need for human interaction and understanding on a deeper level. This yearning is sometimes is all consuming. How do I relate my thoughts, experiences and soul to someone and have them respond with innate understanding? I feel emptiness within me at times, this need to belong to something bigger then myself. The yearning to be both understood on a spiritual level by someone and to  fall deeply, madly and truly in love is so strong it overtakes me. I feel this certain dissatisfaction that is constant and cannot be remedied. My nature is so complex and though I live with the belief that there is something more I am yet have any tangible proof that such a thing exists.

I guess I just have to give myself the necessary space and time, and all will be revealed.

Does this entry resonate with anyone else? Let me know, I'd love to hear from you.

BE

Peace Within

Things can get overwhelming really quickly in life. Sometimes,whether we want to or not we have to face very difficult situations that are deeply distressing. Some things just don't have immediate solutions. Indeed, it feels exhausting to have to constantly adjust our sails to face the incoming strong winds.

Life can be merciless, placing both heavy burdens on our heart and the weight of the world on our shoulders.
Shit happens, I know that well and there have been times where I've had to ride out the storm, yet I've found that I always come out better after having gone through that experience. In hindsight the content of my character was tested most during the most challenging times of my life. It felt like I was against the world. Could I overcome these inner demons? Well, I did. The human capacity for endurance never ceases to amaze me. I'm sure you''ll agree, in times like that, you find a steely resilience within yourself that you never even knew you possessed.

Life can be crazy, hectic and constant. However, we must, in the midst of all the chaos take a step back and be still. You should strive to calm your mind and find peace within. Rest assured that: 'This too shall pass' Grow from your trials and tribulations, they'll only make you stronger and more able.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that in all things do not allow the noise of the outside world dull your senses or dim your spirit. Shine bright. You're worth so much more then the sum of your problems- they don't define you or what you're capable of.

 'Peace. It doesn't mean to be in a place where there is no noise, 
trouble or hard work, It means to be in the midst of those things
and be calm in your heart.' - Anon

BE.

Greater Things

Do you believe yourself to be destined for greater things? Not this mundane, ordinary life that you've been conditioned to lead but a life full of excitement and praiseworthy accolades? You should do. Then I ask:

What separates the average Joe Bloggs from the Steve Jobs and Oprah Winfrey's of this world? 

We all know the answer to that of course, it's a tale as old as time itself - hard work.
Among other skills, their absolute dedication to their craft, obsession with the final product and willingness to go above and beyond the call of duty is what makes iconic individuals celebrated and unforgettable.

However, the individuals that will go down in the history books were not always great. Indeed, they were too leading mundane ordinary lives. The sole distinction between Joe Bloggs off the street and them is that they had unwavering faith in themselves. They carried the belief that someday they will be great with absolute conviction. That is the subtle but all important distinction. You need to wholeheartedly believe you can do it before attempting to convince the rest of the world that you can. And then? You have to strive for greatness. Michael Jordan and The Beatles did not get into the record books of their respective fields because they were content with being second. They went on to be the best because they were never fully satisfied with their craft or themselves, pushing to the end of their human capabilities to obtain a degree of achievement that is awarded to few in this world.

We must continuously strive for greatness. For only people with the necessary insatiable hunger, drive and ambition will be renowned and remembered the world over. When it comes down to it, even if you entered this world as Joe Bloggs you want to leave it as Nelson Mandela.

You may say then, it is all well and good having complete belief in yourself and your capabilities but what about everyone else around you? Part of what provoked me to write this entry was to highlight the damage outsider influence can do. These outsiders will often be the closest people in your life that discourage you from achieving greatness and excelling in your chosen field. 'You can't do that.' Understand that the mass doubt you will recieve is a part of the process, the growing pains if you like, of becoming great. People will always doubt you simply because they are content to settle for their habitual existences of little significance and deeply afraid that you could achieve something that the limits of their own minds could not even began to comprehend. For this reason willingly or otherwise they project their own insecurities onto you.

'My uncle said I'd never sell a million records,
I sold a million records like a million times' 
Jay Z- Crown
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zcvjxng6C4

 To these people, only a simple response is appropriate and you can be back on your way to greatness:

'No, you can't do that.'

BE

Perspective

'Perspective is only valuable once gained'

I thought this would be an appropriate post for where I am in life right now. I find myself, like everyone else constantly saying 'I wish I knew back then, I would have done x y z differently.' My question to you then is - why? 
Why are we so afraid to learn the lesson that can be solely gained through that experience? Why do we yearn for a divine degree of perspective and understanding to shine on us and show us the way before we've even gone through it? Each time I look back on a situation it tells me a little more about myself, how I dealt with it obviously made sense in the moment- I should just trust in my previous judgement and be safe in the knowledge that I did the best I could. Yet, I'm unable to do so. Instead I'm forever feeling foolish for not seeing what seems so clear to me now. Constantly fighting with the then and the now then leads to internal conflict and resentment. 'Why didn't I see that?'

Hindsight, for this reason can be a very dangerous tool, stripping us of our self belief.
If I'm constantly telling myself that I could have done better, spoken better, acted better what does that say about my confidence to handle situations in the moment? Surely the point of life is to have experiences- both good and bad. It's both negative and unproductive to wish you didn't go out with that guy who turned out to be a jerk, or regret offensive words said in the moment. Living a life intertwined with the heavy burden of regret is unnecessarily self- sacrificial. We need to remind ourselves that we went out with the jerk in order to differentiate him from a good guy next time round, we said those offensive things because sometimes the truth is hard to swallow. You can't change the past, you can only look forward to creating a bright future. Don't beat yourself up about what you could or have done, you are human and beautifully, wonderfully flawed. It's okay. Just know that perspective exists so we can learn the lesson and do better next time round.

Perspective allows us to grow as individuals and move forward with clarity and decisiveness. Trust in your self.

BE

Introductions..

Ive had this burning desire to write for so long. Now that im here I'm not quite sure what I ever even wanted to say, or the what the significance of getting it all down would be. I just know that it's a process and the words will come.
Initially i started this blog to write about concepts and ideas we all have about life, about human emotion and the impact of relationships. Its what I enjoy most. You're not interested in reading about my daily musings and titbits from my ordinary life with its ordinary struggles. Rather, I'd rather speak on things that we have in unity - how vast yet short time feels, the importance of perspective. I'm writing this for me, so that I am able to share my racing thoughts and capture them as I grow, but I'm also writing this for you so that you too can take away a little something of my limited insight. My greatest hope is that whoever reads this just 'gets it.' My inate need for mutual understanding provokes me to write this, regardless of any physical distance.. so, enjoy comment and engage with me.

BE